Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Those Little White Window Stickers

I'm sure you all know which ones I mean. The ones on the back of the very large window of that SUV or van that have a white vinyl daddy and a mommy and kids, pets, etc., all represented accurately by gender if not by personal likeness. Sometimes you see the little white vinyl Calvin kneeling at the Cross sticker, only it's the modern boy-with-imagination Calvin, not the great Reformer.

I usually find them mildly reassuring (except for the ones that have boy-with-imagination Calvin peeing on La Migra), especially when the Cross ones are combined with those of a dad and mom plus a healthy number of little boys and girls lined up side by side. Even more reassuring when I pass the van and the mom and dad look a lot like members of my family, if you know what I mean.

But sometimes the sight is a little more disturbing, and today's just iced the cake. I was heading over to the post office to mail off a package and was stuck right behind the most massive, lichen green Expedition I'd ever seen. I swear it was twice the size of any monster SUV in the world and screamed domesticity and car pool from every wheel well.

Then I looked at the little white window stickers, of which there were a multitude. A Cowboy Calvin knelt at the foot of the Cross. Well, that's OK, I like country music myself, I thought. Then I glanced over at the family stickers. Daddy. All right there. Mama. Yee-ha! Curly-headed little girl. Cute! Then...cat...then cat...then cat. Hmm. Well, I like kitties. But where were the other children?

Wait! More stickers! Dog...then dog...then dog. Not so encouraging, and there were still stickers to be examined. In fact, the stickers streamed all the way across the back window of that oversized monster of an SUV.

The next sticker was a HORSE. Then another horse. Following those were two birds, in formation, one after the other.

I could only thank heaven those folks could only afford two horses, because if they could they'd have to buy another SUV in order to have enough little white window sticker space.

But something was really wrong with that window display, and I know I am getting up on my soapbox here, but y'all will put up with me, won't you? You've been good that way before, so bear with me, OK?

It's fine to love animals. I grew up around animals, and except for one ornery rooster I have fond memories of most of them. I would go back into a burning building to grab my cat and get her the heck out of there. But I KNOW she's not human, much as I love her.

There's something wrong with elevating animals to the status of children, and of having more of them than you have kids. Animals aren't human, and they won't help build back the ground we as a people have lost. They won't live long enough to see you through to your old age, and, while they won't steal your social security check, they won't read Little Geneva Report out loud to you once your eyesight is gone. (Of course, progeny who read Little Geneva Report out loud to you once your eyesight is gone aren't the kind of folks that steal social security checks anyhow.)

When people become less important than pets, we're in some serious trouble, folks. Because when we shuffle off this mortal coil and all that is left behind is a menagerie, there goes Western civ. Horses don't read Shakespeare. Cats don't imitate Bouguereau, although I've heard tell of one that paints...abstract art, of course. And what is a dog without a master to love? Only an animal that hunts in packs. Don't even mention birds...that rooster was a real no 'count.

I believe in Occidental culture. The Western world and civilization is worth preserving. For those of us of fertile years, that means producing enough people capable of appreciating what is has to offer to keep the whole thing going and create more of that culture. Then loving the munchkins enough to educate them about the best our civilization had produced, and training those kids to behave like the kind of people God requires us to be. Besides, children come with bonuses like hugs (and future grandkids).

So I'm grateful for the ample size of the vans, station wagons, and SUVs I see lined up at my church on Sundays. And I know that when I look at those back windows I'm not going to see one lone curly-headed vinyl urchin and a passel of pets, but a robust string of progeny, many arrows in the quivers God has given us.

"Nuff said. I'm off my soapbox now.

God bless,


S. C. Mooney said...

I know what you mean - you have to wonder whether it deserves getting all that worked up about, and yet you simply cannot buy into the animal mania that seems to be growing these days. I remember an incident about 5 years ago when my father's dog was in his lap and licking him vigorously all over his face. He sat there relishing it. I expressed some distaste. In response he looked me in the eye, fixed his gaze upon me, and said, "Let me tell you something: I love that dog every bit as much as I love you!" After that I knew it wouldn't work out to try to say any more.

Laurel1861 said...

I am SO sorry to hear of your father's gaffe...pity the poor man! His son, devoted to him, capable of helping him, and of similar life span to him standing there being compared to a dog! No matter how talented the dog is with all the mechanisms of affection (including slobbery dog kisses), it will pass on, most likely, long before he does, and will most certainly not read anything aloud to him once he's lost his vision, nor support him in his old age.

That said, you were wise to be silent.

Probably your dad doesn't really think that dog = S.C. really, in the depths of his heart. People are way more important than beasts, no matter how charming the beasts might be, and family even more so.

God bless,

Anonymous said...

Your post made me a bit uncomfortable, actually. Why so obsessed with how many kids people are having? We have horrible overpopulation already, and many families cannot afford to have families.
Maybe that couple was infertile? Maybe they simply do not want children, which shouldn't make them a victim of judgement. Maybe right now in their lives, they cannot afford more than one child?
Maybe they are simply very compassionate towards animals, and have taken in shelter cats/dogs?

How blessed we are that they've opened their homes to so many animals, and give them love. This is something that would make God smile, I believe.

My personal opinion is that people are having way too many kids these days. 5-6 kids is just too much. We have limited resources left, cost of living is getting worse, and all those SUVs/minivans are gas guzzlers hurting our environment. Having said that, I respect someone's want to have many children - and truly believe no one should ultimately be judged for the size of their family.

God Bless.

Laurel1861 said...

I have a small project for you, Anonymous. If you are truly concerned about overpopulation, please note which nations and ethnicities are having the most children and then go talk to them about overpopulation and having fewer children.


Don't be so harsh on the ethnicities who are not even reproducing at the replacment level.

Personally I find the people who make me uncomfortable are those who encourage my People to commit suicide while others overfill the earth.

That would be you.

God bless, and please address your concerns to the people most likely to need the advice.